The Controlling Partner

Once upon a time there was a woman who was married to a controlling partner.

Her partner wouldn’t allow her to express herself freely. Her partner wouldn’t allow her to dress the way she wanted or to be her authentic self. Her partner tried to shut her down when she was emotional, talked badly to her and tried to keep her small.

The partner was afraid. The partner didn’t trust the safety within the relationship. The partner didn’t trust that the woman could keep them safe. It’s the lack of safety and trust that resulted in the partner’s toxic control.

One day the woman sat her partner down. She told the partner she would show them how safe they are. She would show them she always has their back. Will always set boundaries, speak their truth, honour their needs, never abondon them. She would be honest and truthful to them both, always. It took a bit of time, but the trust slowly built. The partner, in time, learnt to implicitly trust the woman. Enough to let go of the toxic control. Finally allowing the woman to have freedom within the relationship they share.

This not only provided the woman with freedom, but it also providing the partner with freedom. They were now both free to live the roles they were always intended to have, within their marriage.

This woman’s partner is her ego.